Quote of the day

So I found a quote today I love.  "People say you don't know what you've got until its gone.  Truth is, you always new knew what you had, you just never thought you would lose it."  And that is 100% correct.  So I text Teddy and I get a response today that first tells me he is at church (which I felt was totally irrelevant) and that it wasn't him that came here and to protect myself.  Ok, which i slept with my gun next to my bed when I did manage to go to sleep this morning.  And then, when I don't respond because I was sleeping, I get another message telling me he hopes I didn't take the message the wrong way.  I tell him I didn't and thats cool.  Then I get another message telling me that he is trying to show concern (which I feel like you shouldn't have to try to "show" concern, either you are concerned or you aren't) and then tells me that I obvioulsy have a lot of anger towards him and he is trying to let his anger towards me go.  No one said I was angry, I am hurt, sad, and depressed.  I tell him this and the only response he has is that he is sorry I feel that way.  If i was so angry with him, I would not be begging him to work things out and make them right.  I would not care that he wasn't here and that he didn't want me.  I think he thinks that with enough time we are going to be cool and friends or something, but that is not going to be possible for me.  I can't sit here and act like his friend when I still have all these emotions and feelings for him.  And someday, when someone else comes along that does want me, I am not going to be friends with my ex.  He would have not wanted me to be friends with an ex so I can't be friends with him and be with someone else.  He seems very confused and I know part of him has to miss me and care about me, but obvioulsy that is not enough for him.  I keep thinking that the next day when I get up this will be easier or not so hard to accept nad deal with,......it hasn't thus far but I guess there is always tomorrow.